The return of Simon F.
Dave's World's Official Northern Idaho correspondent, Simon F., has returned from his hiatus. Turns out he was tipped off by a reliable source that July was when the Red Army was finally going to invade the Idaho panhandle, and he was prepared to hide in his undergound bunker for the duration. But he ran out of Cheetos. Some things are worth risking capture by Commies.
On Villanova: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Maybe the best team in
the nation on paper, but getting ranked in the second five based on
the fact that they are Villanova. I say they are, in many
ways, more talented than Duke. But, since Duke will get every break in the world along the way, it's hard not to pick a good Duke team No.
1. I'm still pissed about UNC getting past Villanova. Another thing that will hurt Villanova is that the Wildcats are playing in what is arguably the toughest conference in the history of college basketball. The Big East is just brutal and even the best teams will probably take as many as five losses before the postseason.
Why you want the Red Sox to sign Bret Boone:
1. The guy is the best defensive second basemen in the game.
There is not even a close second. No contending team ever got worse for
improving their defense up the middle. Boone and Renteria would be one of the best double-play combos the game has seen in many years.
2. Don Baylor. As one of the last guys in the nation still subscribing
to The Sporting News, I had to applaud this week when they ran a
comment from a scout that questioned what the hell was going on with Mariners hitters and wondered if Don Baylor wasn't the problem. Every player on that team is struggling with the bat, from Ichiro to Willie Freaking Bloomquist. It's tough to blame it all on Baylor, but when
scouts are starting to wonder what the hell is going on, you gotta
wonder if the change of scenery might not give the guy a boost. (Digression No. 1 Boone does face justified questions about his
status as a (Dave's World edit: "legal supplement loyalist"). But even if his inflated power numbers were a result of better living through (DW edit: "protein shakes and lots of grilled chicken,") the guy has always hit at least as well as Mark Bellhorn)(Digression No. 2: What
the hell did Don Baylor ever do to earn a job as a hitting coach? Was it that he NEVER had a .300 season in his 19 years? That he NEVER drove in 100 runs? The highlight of his solid career was two 30-plus jack seasons and the 1986 postseason where he hit the hell out of the ball. The Mariners, BTW, have a history of bizarre hitting coaches. This is the team that had Jesse Barfield a couple years ago. What, was Rob Deer too busy to take the job?)
3. He's a good guy. I've never met him, but a buddy who
covers the team says he's one of the better guys he's ever
dealt with. He might not be a perfect fit with the Red Sox clubhouse
mentality, but he's humbled at this point and would probably be
simply happy to contribute. Besides, you guys already got Johnny Olerud, so there's a nice connection for Boone.
4. Why not? You are immediately better on defense, the
guy's a freaking wizard, and if he wakes his slumping ass up
you've got a legit power threat who could put up nutty numbers in
Fenway. Dunno. I know I'd like to see Boone in a Red Sox uni. The
Mariners are done and can't afford to play a struggling vet at
the expense of the future. It's really a no-risk pick up for the
Sox.
So, as for Villanova. Are you paying attention, dear readers? Are you in Vegas right now? If you are, put your money down on Nova reaching the Final Four. Simon F. knows three things: Schlitz, where to find $300-per-month ocean-view lofts in downtown Tacoma, and college hoops. SF and I are possibly the only two people in the country looking at college hoops right now and have both come to the conclusion that Nova's preseason ranking (generally around No. 9 or 10 depending on the poll) is too low.
With Boonie, Simon has simply been attempting to extract revenge for the Lowe/Varitek for Slocumb deal for eight years now. Last year he tried to tell me that 'Tek and Nixon for Sele straight up would be a steal for the Sox. So take it with a grain of salt.
*Just an observation. My phone line/net connection is down because my roommate is changing providers. So I'm at a cafe in West Seattle with net access. It is a small, crowded cafe. Sitting in front of me is Brandi. I don't know that she spells her name with an "i," but seeing as she is an adult with oversized pigtails, I am guessing that's how she spells it. Anyway, Brandi keeps having screaming matches over her cell phone, apparently with her roommate, about who should clean up the apartment. And since she has absolutely no problem letting everyone in the cafe in on her drama, I figure the whole world may as well know. So Brandi's roommate, on the odd chance you're reading this, make her clean the whole damn apartment herself.
Someone else just walked into the cafe with a t-shirt that reads "LJ for MVP." I don't know who LJ is. I do know I'm getting outta here.
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